Magic 501: Responsibility
Responsibility is a bitch. There’s no other way to put it.
One of the worst parts of being a priest is responsibility. Being a priest is a leadership role—not just in the sense that we are responsible to our spirits and our children or the people we lead, but also in the sense that the role demands a long, continuous process of maturity. It’s never safe to coast on our previous achievements, and every time we grow up a little more, the weight of that responsibility gets a little heavier.
In the entries before the ‘magic’ series, I discussed that authority is something which a priest establishes for themselves. To be frank, not only is this true, but at some point we are asked to choose who chooses: when we make a choice, whose authority are we citing? Under whose authority are we empowered to decide?
This is done deliberately, as a part of the process of maturing a priest. The answer is that we are who chooses. The spirits advise, but more pertinently they train as a part of the training that the divine gives everyone. But the priest must choose. Sometimes, we carefully paraphrase advice—for instance, Guede tends to come in hot, in terms of phrasing. Sometimes we pick a time and a place for something to happen that needs to happen.
However, the priest is the responsible party. Always and ever, when we make decisions. Even when those decisions involve following the advice of the spirit.
When we give orders, the order and its outcome are our responsibility. The welfare, ultimately, of our children is also partially our responsibility.
The way we carry responsibility comes out of our character, and no matter how hard any of us might cosplay maturity, it becomes clear quickly when we lack that foundation of character which would allow us to bear responsibility well. You can, as a priest, do your responsibilities with reluctance. With resentment. With desperation. With anger. With hatred. The work will get done, as a priest will suffer aggravated consequences if they do not do the necessary work. But it will bear the energy with which it was done.
The lwa, because of the way lessons work, will respond to that and show you those parts of themselves. They will reflect whatever you show them. The responsibility you carry will carry the energy of your character—flaws and virtues alike. That basis of character which colors responsibility is also the reflection of the divine that the priest will show their children.
Understand, we cannot as priests help but to reflect out our character into everything we touch. The way we see god, the way we see the lwa, the way we handle authority and responsibility, the way we conduct the current of the spirit: all of it passes through our character. It is allowed to do so in many cases because we are learning, though on occasion the lwa may just do it for us.
We cannot pretend to have authority in vodou for long. We cannot pretend to have a certain kind of character for long, either. Every word we speak, every action we take, the way we speak of responsibility and authority: all of it mirrors what and who we are. It’s never more clear than when we talk about god.
The question is what sort of mirror we are. The answer lies in everything we do and our relationship to responsibility.
